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In the article 6 ways your child thrive socially in middle school, Jessica Lahey said middle school friendship can feel both euphorically intense and frighteningly transitory. I can relate when I was in middle school it was so important to make friends that you have a lot in common with. When someone say they don't want to be your friend anymore it makes you think what did you do, who told you to stop being friends with me. I use to feel super hurt and try to figure out why they stop being friends with me. In middle school there was so much drama, something that would happen in an other class you will find out in the next 10 mins the whole school will know. Sometimes, its good to drop a friend because they probably wasn't a good friend for you.
As kids get older, communication moves from being more explicit to more implicit, and some kids have difficulty making that transition, said Stacey Ellison Glasgow. That is very true when I was a pre-teen my mom would always tell me don't talk to no-one that is 2 years older than you because they might make you do something that you don't have any business doing. Some older kids can bring you into drama that didn't have anything to do with you but they can blame you because you associate with them. Sometimes you wouldn't be able to relate to what some of your older peers are talking about.
“Only 1 percent of seventh-grade friendships are still intact in 12th grade, and more than two-thirds of friendships shift during the first year of middle school". This quote said a lot, yes this is true. Some of the friendships I had during middle school and high school I don't even have anymore. Thats because we all started to meet new people, didn't have any classes together. We just fell apart from each other, sometimes you think your friendship is so strong but then when other things come around its different.
"If your daughter is wounded that a classmate didn’t invite her to a birthday party, for instance, you might want to remind her that she didn’t invite that kid to her party" (Fagell). The quote really reminds me on how I use to think in middle school. I use to be mad if someone didn't invite me to their birthday party because all my friends were invited but me. It made me realize that there was a reason why I didn't need to go, I might have not seen that in the moment but once its was all over something happen.
Triangle
Some adolescents struggle with the conflict inherent in the need to depend on parents for support as they move to independence(Brown 38). That is surprising to me because parents should support their child with every time that they do. Middle schools are some challenging years that some adolescents go through and they need that love from their parents.
Young adolescents experience two stages of identity formation, the first is industry versus inferiority when 10- to 11-year-olds identify themselves by the tasks and skills they perform well, and the second one is identity versus identity when 12- to 15-year-olds explore and experiment with various roles and experiences (Caskey). I didn't know that young adolescents go through stages to identity themselves. Now it make sense why I would try to do some crazy things because I would see my classmates doing it, since everybody was doing it I thought it was okay.
Technology has a dramatic impact on the young adolescent in both positive and negative ways (Brown 39). That is important because technology can really help students to learn but it can also can teach them something that is not good. Sometimes technology show you thinks you don't need to see. I see why my parents would restrict certain websites from my phone and allow me to be on my phone for so long. They wanted me to use technology for the good things that it has.
Circle
How can teachers help middle schoolers to create great friendships?
How can parents accept their child for who they are instead of disliking them?
Why do young adolescents feel alone like they are the only ones going through something?
Six ways to Help Your Child Thrive Socially in Middle School
Research Summary: Developmental Characteristics of Young Adolescents
What Every Middle School Teacher Should Know by Dave Brown and Turdy Knowles
I really like your question on can teachers help students to create long lasting friendships because personally I have become friends with teachers and my friendships with them and with other students were always strengthened because we were all friends due to being in a class with that teacher.
I love your reflection and questions at the end! I especially love your question "How can teachers help middle schoolers to create great friendships?" It's a question that I have never thought about before. I think that a way for teachers to support middle schoolers in creating friendships is by creating an environment that promotes team building and community. Many times, teachers are so focused on individual performance that they forget to allow students to work with others and learn about how others work and behave. Thanks for bringing up your reflection question! -Sarah Yonamine
Thanks for sharing and finding ways to connect with your own experiences. It is clear that you really took a lot out of the readings regarding social development.